"But Hagrid, how am I to pay for any of this? I haven't any money!" 11 year old Harry Potter exclaimed, confusion in his face as they walked down the busy street.
"There's yer money, 'Arry! Gringotts, the wizards back," Hagrid said, pointing. Harry looked forward and saw the giant marble building, dragon statue perched on top of it, its eyes glowing an imposing red. As they neared the building Hagrid stopped and turned towards Harry, fishing around in his pocket.
"Now put this on," he commanded, shoving a gray balaclava into his hands. Harry hurried to follow directions, unsure of what sort of weird custom this was but deciding it's best to comply. Hagrid was the wizard, after all. Looking down at him, Hagrid nodded, his own massive mask now covering his face.
"You ready, "Arry?"
Harry nodded.
Hagrid kicked the massive doors to the bank open and they slammed with a giant thwack, their hinges creaking under the force. As they stepped into the bank, every goblin in the atrium turned to look at this, just as Hagrid pulled his umbrella out. Holding it to the sky, he pumped out once.
Bang
"Alright you lot, listen up. You're gonna load all the gallons, sickles, and knuts you can into this bag that my friend here will hold. No funny business or I'm gonna get trigger happy. This day doesn't call for rain, but I'm willing to make it pour if I got to."
Hagrid dropped the bag to Harry…and it engulfed the small boy entirely.
"What are you doing, "Arry? Open the bag."
Harry huffed as he unburied himself from the large satchel. "Hagrid, this thing is bigger than I am. It looks like it's meant for my cousin."
"That's the small one," Hagrid pointed out.
A goblin began to move towards the exit and Hagrid pumped his umbrella again before pointing it at the offending creature.
"Don't be a hero buddy. Live to fight another goblin rebellion."
Hagrid whirled around, or more accurately, kind of just, half turned? Harry didn't know. Hagrid was a big guy who moved slowly, but he pointed the umbrella at a different goblin.
"Oi, you. The one that looked like a dried up raisin! Not you, the other one. No, the other other one. Yes, you!"
Hagrid flipped him a key.
"Vault 713. Make it snappy. Fingers gettin mighty itchy."
And so the goblins in the atrium loaded the giant bag full of wizard money before the other goblin, who Harry had named "raisin bran," returned with a small package. Hagrid smiled.
"Pleasure doing business with you lot," he called, grabbing the massive bag and slinging it over his shoulder. "Tell your bosses that Lucious Malfoy sends his regards."
As they turned to leave, Harry wide eyed as they re-entered the alley and made a beeline to the exit, Hagrid saying something about getting the rest of his stuff another day, Harry smiled.
The wizarding world was weird.